on the road

I guess I seek my path in a wrong way. We need patience and waiting, of course, sometimes it is more important than being active. But when I lose focus while waiting, when I don't know what is my real purpose any more, when I forget or am too lazy to turn to God every day, I slip off the road and just roam around life. Too much time is dangerous, as much as too little.
In this part of my life I have time to think about my purposes, this is the pure opportunity to think about the meaning of life, without boundaries and fixity, I have never been more free in my life - and yet I long for people to love, an avocation to serve, a place to call it home.
Yet, I can wait. I got the strenght to love, to wait, to listen, and to act. I want to learn the art of balance. Sleeping, exercising, listening to God, love my family and friends and spend quality time with them, and do some  creative work.
There is so much things in the world that is not ok, cases when we are really blind, in Hungary too, and in the systems and in ourselves, of course. But changing the world always start with little steps, day by day, with everyday duties and beauties, being in the present -  focusing not on ourselves. And knowing Somebody had already redeemed us, we only continue the task.
(I feel difficult and hard to talk about Christ, because words change the reality, but I believe and am sure that even if I am or the world and life are on a wrong way, there is God who loves us and take care of each of us.)