Tuesday, June 30, 2015

ruminating

As this spring and summer pass, I feel that I somehow in the middle of a battle. I am not sure who is against who, but I strongly feel that I need to be really honest with myself. And in this case I can live more than I could ever imagined to live.
In the past three years I followed my instinct, even if it had said to go 9000 miles or stay in one place for a year. Now I am in a situation than every important person in my life says I need to do something - don't trust, for example. My deep intuition, however, says to stay and hang on and trust and love, no matter what.
It is hard. It is heartbreaking. This is a battle.
But I will endure it all, and will win over the circumstances. And even if I'm not certain in some aspects of my life - for example what to do, what is my real calling - I'm profoundly sure that I need to keep love and be faithful.
It's not a desert. It's a spring.